I saw a Febreze commercial the other day. The advertised product has a good scent and kills x percent of bacteria.
The product smells so good that each actor that sprays it takes in a huge breath… of toxic Febreze. No wait, it only kills bacteria, right? So it can’t possibly be BAD for you.
All the company needs is for some idiot kids to sniff it until they develop some disease and consequently sue.
Archive for December, 2006
Moesha (my ’95 Mercury), broke down a couple of days ago on the way to Pearl’s. She started smoking, her temperature went to extreme, her battery light went on, and power steering went out. Moesha and I were very fortunate, however, to be near a place that happens to fix this sort of problem.
It turns out that I need to fix the serpentine belt. Didn’t know what that is? Neither did I! I should have; Ford recommends that I change it every 50,000 miles. I like how the article mentions this factoid:
it is easier for the driver to know when the belt has broken, since this will cause the steering resistance to suddenly increase.
Yeah, that was me. No power steering.
On the plus side, I found a really really great service station, Atlanta Express Lube. The guys who work there are nice, and they totally didn’t pull that routine where they tell me my car is really dirty and they need to replace a hundred different dirty things in the hood. I’m totally going back there to get some more work done on my car.
So I’m sleeping normally having one of my awesome dreams and I realize I hear the sound that a ferret makes when it walks across the kitchen–except on my pillow. I was pretty freaked out so obviously I woke up and looked around and saw nothing.
I went back to bed and 10 minutes later I hear this scratching noise that I normally hear in the attic, behind my dresser. Normally this wouldn’t phase me as anything but the fact is, I don’t know about you, but I don’t enjoy being bitten in my sleep.
I took a trip to my parents room and had my mom investigate. I stood in the hallway and explained the rodent was behind my dresser. Now at this point I’m picturing maybe a ferret, maybe a mouse, and maybe even a Rat. I really was not sure. So my mom walks in and shakes my dresser like I requested and the next thing I know she sprinting out of my room screaming, “AHHHH, IT’S A CHIPMUNK!!!!!”
The beast himself was finally revealed. For some reason my mom and I then went down to her computer. I was thinking maybe we would be searching online for what chipmunks eat or what they’re attracted to, but no. My mom is sending an e-mail to all my family explaining to them how “I am afraid of Alvin.” Yes, she named it. But the joke is on her. She actually sent the email out explaining how “I was terrified of the creature” to my family from her e-mail address when the whole time she thought it was from mine, making her look like the scarediecat.
Yeeee.
I biked over to the local Burger King a couple of days ago with a grocery bag in my pocket, went inside, and bought the games. I put the games in my grocery bag so that I could bike back with them.
Anyway, they’re fun!
I was going to post something about my 30 minute wait/conversation with Sprint, but this Verizon thing is better. Somehow they cannot fathom the difference between cents and dollars. How do you stay in business that way?
There’s a transcript here: http://verizonmath.blogspot.com/2006/12/transcription-jt.html
G: Well okay, is it.. is there a difference between .002 dollars and .002 cents?
M: .002 dollars and .002 cents.
G: Yes, is there a difference between..
M: Sir, sir, they’re.. they’re both the same if you, if you look at ‘em on paper-wise
G: No.. they’re not, actually. It.. is .5 dollars the same as .5 cents?
M: Is .5 dollars..?
G: Is half a dollar..
M: That would be.. That would be 50 cents.
G: A half a dollar.. is it the same as a half of a cent?
M: No.
G: Right.
M: Okay.
… but the Verizon reps never understand it!
A text message conversation between me and James.
Me: How can you kill that which has no life?
James: Eat it.
Me: Are you a chemoautotroph?
James: No idea what that is.
Me: It eats things with no life. Like chemicals.
James: Then yes.
Pearl sent me this.
I just received this letter in my mailbox from the apartment complex I live in. Basically, if I don’t renew my lease by the end of January, then I get a $60 discount in my rent. Either they’re idiots or they loved my complaints about the bike rack (which took 3 months to install by the way). The letter is after the jump.
Continue reading ‘My Apartment: idiotic?’
Look what my professor sent me. Pretty awesome I think.
http://www.cnn.com/2006/WORLD/asiapcf/12/14/china.dolphins.ap/index.html
The long arms of the world’s tallest man reached in and saved two dolphins by pulling out plastic from their stomachs, state media and an aquarium official said Thursday.
The dolphins got sick after nibbling on plastic from the edge of their pool at an aquarium in Liaoning province.
Attempts to use surgical instruments to remove the plastic failed because the dolphins’ stomachs contracted in response to the instruments, the China Daily newspaper reported.
I have a wishlist for Hannukah/birthday/random occassions. It’s been on my site if you mouseover the “Lee Katz” on the main page, but here it conspicuously is.
http://froogle.google.com/shoppinglist?a=SWL&id=5365f3ccdca39de9d044fd45fb8ec661a4fd118
I’m visiting NYC on Friday wooooo
Any ideas for what to do? I have lots of ideas, but more ideas are welcome. I’m already going to some museums and going to tour around.
If my cousins actually get back to me, maybe we will do something. I wish they wouldn’t be so out of sight out of mind.
I’ve been watching old Zelda episodes, and so far my favorite line is the reply to “Without magic, you have to stop him with nonmagical means.” To which Zelda replied, “what, do you mean like, bugs?”
(You later find out that they throw bees and ants at the enemies.)
Oh man I love that show. Too bad it’s only one season.
So there I was: about $2.50 in change, a coupon for a Wendy’s frosty, and an insatiable appetite.
You can guess the rest.