But the pet exists in a virtual world that only interacts with your mouse.
http://bunnyherolabs.com/adopt/showpet.php?b=bWM9aGFtc3Rlci5zd2YmY2xyPTB4OGVkZWMzJmNuPWdvYWxpZSZhbj1sZWUga2F0eg==
Archive for September, 2005
I just read this abbreviation in the news and had a small chuckle.
Association of South East Asian Nations (Asean)
It’s like they made an abbreviation sound like the adjective that I used to describe someone from southeast asia.
Is it going to be in the future like, the US, the EU, and then Asean being the superpowers?
When Osama bin Laden died, he was met at the Pearly Gates
by George Washington, who slapped him across the face and
yelled, “How dare you try to destroy the nation I helped
conceive!”
Patrick Henry approached, punched him in the nose and
shouted, “You wanted to end our liberties but you failed.”
James Madison followed, kicked him in the groin and said, “This
is why I allowed our government to provide for the common
defense!”
Thomas Jefferson was next, beat Osama with a long cane and
snarled, “It was evil men like you who inspired me to write the
Declaration of Independence.”
The beatings and thrashings continued as George Mason,
James Monroe and 66 other early Americans unleashed their
anger on the terrorist leader.
As Osama lay bleeding and in pain, an Angel appeared. Bin
Laden wept and said, “This is not what you promised me.”
The Angel replied, “I told you there would be 72 Virginians
waiting for you in Heaven. What did you think I said?”
I used to get something like 40-50 unique hits a day on the site, but for whatever reason the last week, it’s been about 70-80.
So what? Are you going to sign the guestbook yet? I have like 30 total over all time in the guestbook. Gonna comment? Tell me that you read the site? Who are you people?
And I still don’t know why my jobs ad-lib is the best one by far. I feel like I have to make another one soon…
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/middle_east/4280262.stm
Amid threats of revenge attacks from militants, Palestinian negotiator Saeb Erekat called on US President George W Bush to step in to calm the conflict “so we can sustain the cessation of violence”.
However, the US ambassador in Israel said: “We all know that the terrorists are trying to provoke Israel at a very sensitive time and we understand exactly what the government’s position is and the response it has taken.”
So yeah, it looks like pulling out only encouraged Hamas, and what else did we learn? That the US has poor diplomacy. Moderators don’t take sides before they start moderating! Uggg send in Jimmy Carter or Bill Clinton again. I think that I should apply to be an ambassador just because I’d be better than that idiot.
A man walks into the street and manages to get a taxi just going by. He
gets into the taxi, and the cabbie says, “Perfect timing. You’re just
like Moishe.” Passenger: “Who?”
Cabbie: “Moishe Glickman. There’s a guy who did everything right. Like
my coming along when you needed a cab. It would have happened like that to
Moishe every single time.” Passenger: “There are always a few clouds over everybody.”
Cabbie: “Not Moishe. He was a terrific athlete. He could have gone on
the pro tour in tennis. He could golf with the pros. He sang like an
opera baritone and danced like a Broadway star and you should have heard him
play the piano.”
Passenger: “Sounds like he was something, huh?”
Cabbie: “He had a memory like a computer. Could remember everybody’s
birthday. He knew all about wine, which foods to order and which fork
to eat them with. He could fix anything. Not like me. I change a fuse, and the whole neighborhood blacks out.” Passenger. “Wow, some guy ehh?
Cabbie: “He always knew the quickest way to go in traffic and avoid
trafficjams, not like me, I always seem to get into them”
“Passenger” Mmm, not many like that around”
Cabbie: “And he knew how to treat a woman and make her feel good and
never answer her back even if she was in the wrong; and his clothing was
always immaculate, shoes highly polished too.”
Passenger: “An amazing fellow. How did you meet him?”
Cabbie: “Well, I never actually met Moishe.”
Passenger: “Then how do you know so much about him?”
Cabbie: “I married his widow.”
Okay, so everyone who knows me knows that I don’t know crap about famous people, save The Beatles and uh maybe the Whose Line is it Anyway? cast. But now I am reading just about all of those sites to the right under the category “superficial” to catch up on it all. I might surprise you people yet with how much more I will know about famous people!
(no word yet on when I will catch up on popular songs or sports)
Simon Wiesenthal, nazi hunter, died last night.
In all, he was believed to have brought 1100 war criminals to trial. The Simon Wiesenthal Centre, set up in the United States in 1977, has pressed for the extradition of numerous war crimes suspects, as well as campaigning for the rights of Holocaust survivors and an end to pensions for SS officers.
Dear Universe, controller of karma,
Please note that Maryanne kicked me today and I did nothing back. Maybe I could take a little abuse this year and get into medical school?
P.S. don’t let Maryanne kick me again.
At the gym today before class, I measured my body fat ratio on this handheld device. I’m about 10%.
My question is, What do I need to do to get my six pack on the surface? What do you want from me, nature? Huh? The six pack is there, but I need to reduce the fat below 10%? Outrageous!
Okay busy weeks. That’s enough.
I probably failed my test, but I finished some med school applications and I finished a paper and I finished a lab and I almost finished another lab and hey it’s almost Friday again.
Did anyone read the sunday paper with my mom’s sleep apnea advertisement? It’s running on Sundays for five weeks.
Also, my job ad-lib seems to be the best one by far, according to my counter. Anyone want to tell me why? What kind of ad-lib should I make next? Anyone want to share their ad libs via the comments here?
I’ve seen this picture of the Hiltons a couple of times lol
Do you think that a juice that advertises “Gently Pasteurized” is good?
…
Well what if I said it realistically? Like, “Gently killed off all the bacteria through a gental heat cycle.” That’s the orange juice that I got from Einstein’s Bagel place the other day. And it did taste good despite all the now-heat-resistant bacteria.
Here’s a hypothetical letter.
Dear Einstein’s,
I would like the option to brutally pasteurize my orange juice instead of the gental process that you inflict upon the possible pathogens in my drink.Signed,
Lee Katz.
I want to post the resume story for everyone so that I can tell it to you guys all at once.
Susheel and I went to this resume building thing after class. You know, the kind where someone sits next to you and tells you how your resume could look better.
So anyway, we went over to the Success Center and after some looking around, we found some people sitting at a table who were the resume builders. Susheel and I signed in and each took someone to help us. My person told me to change these margins and those margins and make that bold, etc.
After 15 minutes, we were done, and I looked over at Susheel and he says, “Oh man I’m so pissed.”
“Why?”
“Because those were Waffle House Employees! Didn’t you see their nametags?”
So there you have it. I could get hired at Waffle House. Maybe this story is better if I tell it orally.